A black and white image of a woman
A black and white image of a woman
Photo by Jairo Alzate on Unsplash

Stay silent when your father hits you for voicing your opinion.

Do not question your mother when she tells you that you are to be given away like a commodity.

Don’t raise your voice against your brother for he is a boy!

Darling, you are just a woman and nothin more

You are merely a vessel to bring new life into the world.

You are just the womb that nurtures life, It is no big deal darling for it's your duty.

Just like how it is your duty to carry the weight of your family’s reputation on your fragile shoulders.

The concept of spending time for yourself has been around for a long time, but many of us do not get to do it consistently.

To be fair given the busy schedules and lives, spending some quality time for ourselves has become watching YouTubers pampering themselves and Googling how to effectively spend some “me” time and then promising to do it the next day, but that day seldom comes.

The definition of me-time and the way people spend it may vary from person to person. …

PC : unsplash — Kelly Sikkema

Dear dad,

You were nothing but a familiar stranger

A Voice filled with kindness and love

Over those rare telephone calls.

A photograph of a handsome smile

And that was all I knew of you

My first step, they say was holding your hands dad.

But I missed having pictures of me taken with you,

I missed climbing onto your lap as often as I wished.

I remember

I remember the first time I met you

Hurling myself into your arms like a canon ball

in that crowded airport

Cocooned in your strong arm, I remember running my little hands…

what more could an introvert ask for? Limited contact with people. No colleagues to “chat” while working. I honestly thought I was in for a treat. And I also very mistakenly was under the impression that since I will not be going out at all, my anxiety would be so kind to me and take a rest for its daily/hourly/ secondly (I’m not even sure if it is a word, but if you know a better word, please let me know. It would be nice to learn) torture of my mind.

But no, I could not be positively more wrong…

PC Unsplash, Callum skelton

I am him and her

Order and chaos

And everything in between

A sob of a wilted flower

A roar of the hungry lion

A twisted soul filled with agony

A happy heart brimming with innocence

half of her and a half of him.

I thrive in darkness, lurking in the shadows unseen

Devil’s own I laugh and shriek at the misery of my own soul

The good in me suppressed and banished

To the depths of inky darkness.

Bound in shackles, bursting to come out

I am the girl whose tears were worthless

I am the boy, who…

Pc background: Etsy from Canva

The first time I self-harmed in a major way was when I was in 8th grade. Looking back now, the memories are blurred, the inks of it bled into the parchment, illegible and faded.

But the feel of the blade still remains. It was like a cool kiss. Soft at first and then with a higher intensity till the skin parted and allowed the blood to flow out. It was a heady feeling. The pain and the sense of peace, comfort, and serenity it provided.

I don't exactly recall why I did it, but I was incredibly sad and felt…


A 20 something year old writer in Making.

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